It's Just Food!

As many of you know, I have spent over 30 years struggling with food, weight, eating, exercise, body image and self esteem.   A few years ago, I'd had ENOUGH....and began a journey to freedom, peace and joy.  

I have since been working as a Lifestyle Strategist, with many women who have struggled as well.  

I have decided to share the 5 step formula that saved my life (from a life full of the continued shackles of dieting and the thin ideal) 

If you are interested in hearing about the webinar...read on...if not, a new blog will be us soon :) 

The low cost on-line webinar is Wed night August 15th (starts at 7PM, last approx. 1 hour including questions and answers)  AND it will be recorded. (in case you can't make the time)

You can click here to register.

The webinar is something I've put together to educate, support and empower women like you to have a better and brighter healthier future.  If you are ready to transform your relationship with food, eating, weight, mind, body and self this webinar is for you. 

During the webinar, I will be sharing a proven life-changing 5-step formula on how to be Finally, Free, Fit & Fabulous Once and For All. 

Based on my own personal experience (yes, I understand completely), my 30+ years of experience in the health, fitness and eating disorder fields, education and specialized training I wanted to give overwhelmed women a different way of looking at and addressing their relationships and behaviors around their weight, food and body image... thus I created a simple 5-step formula. 

It is my mission to share this formula with women of all sizes, shapes and weights to help them gain the confidence and courage to  LOVE WHAT IS, LIVE WITH JOY and CONNECT MORE DEEPLY WITH THEMSELVES AND OTHERS.

Once you know the formula you are able to: 

• Feel like food is your friend and not your enemy.
• Enjoy and eat food with more pleasure.
• Tune into your hunger and fullness cues (become an Intuitive Eater).
• Start to make peace with your body.
• Quiet your self-sabotaging negative inner voice and replace it with a life-changing positive self-talk simply by listening.
• Ditch the food rules and fire the food police.
• Know how to avoid fad diets and the conflicting and confusing nutrition advice
• Get off and stay off the failed Dieting Hamster Wheel/Roll Coaster once and for all.
• Gain mental clarity, confidence and courage to live to be the best version of YOU.
• Work towards and achieve your health, fitness and wellness goals even when life gets busy, hectic, is stress-filled and overwhelming. 
• Move, play and exercise with more joy
• Use easy, time efficient Self-care methods/strategies to lower stress (one of the keys to releasing fat and weight)

So, that's what the webinar is about.  A simple 5-step success formula for improving your health/well-being, living authentically and how to become the best version of you.

You'll have a chance to join me, my team and super like-minded women as we discover how to get unstuck or overcome the challenges that have been holding us back plus, you will get a roadmap (a proven simple 5-steps) to achieve your health, fitness and wellness goals and dreams. 

I'll share... 

... How to use a revolutionary mindfulness-based approach (Intuitive Eating) to nourish your body, mind and soul. 

... How to use cutting-edge 21st century technology and tools to make the change process easier, faster and sustainable so goal achievement can be obtained regardless of your everyday life situation.

... How to reduce stress and why Hoping on the Dieting Bandwagon not only doesn't work BUT causes even more stress on the body leading to an increase in the fat storage hormone cortisol. 

... How to use our practical, time-tested and client approved  2x2x2 Movement Formula to get you out of pain, keep you out of pain and release more fat while having more fun. 

... How to appreciate, honor, respect and accept your "here and now" body

The cost is $49, however through Monday August 13th I'm offering a special priced ticket for only $15 which includes an informative, beneficial 4-part education guide called Calorie Counting DEBUNKED Infographic Bundle, a $59 value).

Just click here to enroll (you will find payment information there)

How to Eat Ice Cream Without any Guilt this Summer

Eating Ice cream without guilt only took me 40 years to master.  I hope this will cut down any guilt on your part as you sit and enjoy the ice cream that is in your freezer or from your favorite ice cream shop this summer.  I needed to discover 5 simple steps that would ensure both the enjoyment and satisfaction of my summer ice cream, with NO GUILT OR SHAME.

Imagine a long day at work, your boss is on your case, your computer is possessed, that problem continues to rear its ugly head, and you get stuck in traffic on the way home, even when you took the short cut!

All you want to do is go home, sit in front of the TV with your carton of ice cream (you may have purchased on your way home), and zone out….because at least you deserve that! You continue to feel frustrated and are now obsessed with the thoughts of ice cream.

Fast forward, 30 minutes, WHAM, you are sitting on the couch, staring at an empty carton filled with shame, guilt, anger and disbelief.  You can’t even remember eating it.  The feeling in your stomach is all too familiar.  

THEN COMES THIS:  Your inner critic, that inner mean girl voice (I call her my mini-me) 

She begins her assault on you…

“I can’t believe you did this again!”

“You are so stupid”

“You have NO willpower”

“You can’t do anything right”

“You will never lose weight!”

“You are such a failure”

The first step, when you notice this all too familiar voice is to STOP, this assault is not doing anything productive, other than increase stress and decrease your self-esteem.  This is where to insert the 5 steps.  Yes, 5 steps that focus on finding a way to eating ice cream that feels and tastes good…period.

Let’s rewind and look at another scenario…

Picture this: As soon as you get to work, your boss is on your case, your computer is possessed, that problem continues to rear its ugly head, and you got stuck in traffic on the way home, while taking the short cut.

You can feel your stress level rising as the day progresses.  Thoughts of ice cream bombard your head. Your chest and shoulders are tight, your head is pounding and your stomach is in knots…Ice cream…”I want ICE CREAM!” your inner child screams! 

Here is when you PAUSE…

11.    You close your eyes and take a slow deep breath in and let it out.  You do it again and count to 5 as you inhale, pause and exhale slowly and count to 5 again.

22.  You keep your eyes closed and picture yourself on a beach, or swinging on a swing, or taking in the view at the top of a mountain, or sitting on a rock by a babbling brook.  Your body begins to relax as you visualize this scene. You notice calm and peace flow over your body. 

33. Your eyes open and ask yourself “What do I need?” knowing that the ice cream is right there, a short drive away, or in your freezer.  AND it will STILL BE THERE in 5 minutes

. 

44.  You pause, take another deep breath and think…then ask the question again.  What is it I need?  Am I Bored? Angry? Lonely? Frustrated?  Hungry?  What might sooth this emotion other than the ice cream?  

·     A hot shower?

·     Paint your nails?

·     Call a friend?

·     Take a walk?

·     Journal your thoughts?

·     Listen to your favorite pod cast?

·     Dance around the room to your favorite song?

       Do any of these things sound appealing?  

If SO, then PICK ONE, and when you are done, you THEN ASK THE QUESTION: Do I still want Ice cream?  If the answer is yes, go ahead and move to step 5

IF NOT, take another deep breath.  Notice if you are hungry.  And then Give yourself full permission to have a bowl of ice cream….proceed to step 5

55. The eating of the ice cream!!! Find the prettiest bowl you can, and scoop yourself out some ice cream, you then sit down, light a candle, relax and enjoy. Slowly and simply, savoring every bite, moment to moment (mindfully). An act of mindfulness.  Being in the present moment. 

A smile crosses your face as you realize you just ate ice cream mindfully and fully present.  Something you have never been able to do before and…if you have truly given yourself permission, release any feelings of shame or guilt either, they are not helpful here. 

There is a time and space for ice cream in all our lives.  Release yourself from the inner critic, maybe invite her down to share some ice cream with you next time.  

I wish I knew then, what I know now....A mom's apology to her daughters

When we have children, we are not given a guide book.  All we have is our own experiences, our intuition and what we "think" is best to go on as we raise our children.  OHHH How I wish I knew then, what I know now.

This is a note to my own daughters, apologizing for not modeling or teaching them: (and other young people as well, who grew up with similar role models.)  

That their bodies are uniquely beautiful and individual...and that food has a  purpose and can be enjoyed.

My dearest daughters, 

I want to apologize for not being a very good role model for you when in comes to food, eating and body image.  I was too scared to teach you the wrong things, and contribute to you not feeling good enough.

I grew up in a quest for a better body, knowing and believing that mine did not look like it should and was not "good" enough.

It consumed all my thoughts, actions and behaviors.  It was all I knew. 

As you both grew up, I actually tried to impose the exact opposite of my own thoughts about food and body image on you, because I did not want  you to grow up like me, obsessed with food, calories and the numbers on the scale.  

I wished for you both to have a healthy relationship with food and your bodies.

I would like to take this opportunity to apologize for the following behaviors I am not proud of: 

• Saying no to a slice of your birthday cakes (I didn't want to consume the calories)
• Not eating dinner with you at night (because I had been eating all afternoon)
• Offering you food to ease your pain (I didn't know what else to do)
• Not teaching you a healthy balance and educate you on the importance of food (I did not know it myself)
• Being angry when you couldn't sleep (and caught me eating cheese-its)
• Witnessing my own body hatred when I looked in the mirror (Hearing my internal "mini-me" tell me how fat I was)
• Always being to "tired" to play outside or swim with you at the beach (I had spent all my energy at the gym earlier in the day)
• The hours you spent at the day care in the gym 
• Seeing me throw clothes on the floor in fits of anger 
• Witnessing the "changing of the rules around food" when other people were around (trying to show others I was a good parent)

I wish I knew then, what I know now.  

I would like to take this opportunity to share what I have learned: 

NOW I would teach you

• How to love and appreciate that unique and special body you live in. 
• To listen and trust your own internal messages of hunger and fullness
• That food is not good or bad, it is just food
• To strengthen your own inner MAXI-ME's (the positive, supportive, kind and compassionate inner voice you have in your head) by listening positive self talk with you

I would also: 

• Model balanced eating and moving behaviors
• Look at my own body with respect and appreciation 
• Enjoy dinners, birthday cake, playing at the playground and swimming at the beach
• Stick up for our families relationship with food, no matter who was around.

I am writing this to let you know that we are all human and make mistakes sometimes. It is part of what makes us unique and special, and through these mistakes it creates the opportunity for us to learn and grow.  I am sorry for my mistakes as your mom. 

For you both...

I wish you joy & happiness as you navigate your adult lives

I wish you acceptance and appreciation of your bodies 

I wish you freedom and peace with food and eating 

I wish you forgiveness of self when mistakes are made

I wish you support of good friends and family when times get tough

I wish you continued growth and learning

I wish you a life full of experiences and memories

I wish you much laughter & love

With love,

Mom


If you have any regrets similar to mine, please feel free to reach out at annie@shapingperspectives.com or click here to learn more. 

My food police diary

“You better watch what she eats” the doctor said to my mom, “She weighs more than she should at her age”. 

My mom nodded and looked at my belly. 

It was 1973, the year of Watergate, Roe vs Wade, the ribbon cutting of the world trade center, and the Carly Simons song ‘Your so Vain” played on the radio

This was the year the Food & Diet Police were hired at my home just for me. 

They:

• ·      Watched the foods I put on my plate
• ·      Listened closely for the refrigerator door to open or the candy dish lid to be lifted
• ·      Allowed me only certain foods
• ·      Let me know that “Only your brother can eat that, you cannot”
• ·      Asked me, “How could you be hungry?  You just ate “
• ·      Told me to “Go outside and play, its too early for a snack”

During this time I noticed a steady stream of thoughts and questions that circled around in my brain.

How can I lose weight?

How much more am I going to have to exercise?

What if I can’t lose weight?

Which led to more pressure and more negative thoughts and more obsessiveness to obey the food police.  I felt this drive to keep striving for the approval of my parents, my peers and society.

100% of my time and effort was consumed by keeping my weight in check, keeping up this false idea of what I should look like and striving for this idealized vision of perfection.  I said no to party’s, vacations and invitations to experience life.  The gym became my best friend. I became lost in my compulsion to succeed.

This landed me in the hospital for anorexia nervosa and in the care of multiple psychologists.  It is no wonder I have struggled with food and my body for the last 40+ years. 

It was only when my knee began breaking down that I finally noticed what my body was telling me… I was tired, drained, lacking energy, empty and exhausted. This was the moment I finally realized that it didn’t matter how much time, energy and focus I spent on trying to have the perfect body, meet society’s thin ideal or gain my parent’s acceptance, it was not worth it. 

I knew I had to start listening and respecting my body and it’s needs and fire the food police once and for all.

Click here to grab your free YOU ARE ENOUGH Finally, Free, Fit and Fabulous 5 step guide to peace with food, eating, weight and body image.