A Valentines gift to yourself of time and a wish for you…

I see the apple on the table, I hear my stomach growl, I start to calculate as the numbers tick away in my head...60+80=140+50=190+10+120= 410...no, too much, just walk away...

I walk up the stairs, thinking of what I had done...20 minutes of core work, step class, 30 minutes of legs...

NOT ENOUGH,I should go for a run...

The numbers of calories burned, exercise classes taught or taken, miles run or walked

Calories consumed, calories NOT consumed, points, fat and carb grams counted, Adding and Subtracting;Plotting and Planning

How much longer do I need to stay on this stairmaster?  What should my workout look like tomorrow? the day after that? next week?

What will the scale say when I step on it tomorrow?  Have I worked hard enough? Eaten too much?

What will the ALL MIGHTY SCALE say about my worthiness tomorrow?

Minuteafter minute, day after day, year after year...from 10 years old until almost 50...Over 95% of my thoughts everyday tick away thinking about how I can affect the number on the scale.

4 DECADES of my life, I have spent all of my time counting and calculating, shaming and blaming, pushing and pulling. 

I am sad, frustrated, angry and depressed as I come to this realization.... Why have I wasted so much time with this nonsense?  

I sit and cry, I walk and cry, I curl up in a ball and cry as I move through this strange GRIEVING process.  

So many should haves, why didn't I's, your so stupids...I mourn the loss of so many years of my life...until...Exhaustion sets in, I am tired and all dried up from crying.  

It is time to "fish or cut bait" as my dad would say..."shit or get off the pot" my uncle would say...

Stagnation and depression set in... until...

I think about my daughters, how much I love them, how much I want to see them grow, learn, live and love.  

FINALLY, I get it...I need more time...more time in my brain to live here in this world, to live here today...

It becomes apparent that it is TIME TO THROW AWAY:

• The calorie counter in my brain
• The scale on the bathroom floor
• The fit-bit "rewards"
• The class schedules
• The "map my run" app
• The no pain, no gain attitude 
• The foods I vowed never to eat

TIME TO GAIN BACK TIME:

• Time to read and write
• Time to share time with friends and family
• Time to reconnect with my body
• Time to think about what used to bring me joy
• Time to make a difference
• Time to enjoy both food and movement

This was me only 6 years ago, and every year since then, I have opened up more space in my head, 30%, 40%, 50%, 60% more timeto focus on the life I am living.  Less and less time spent on obsessing and calculating.

This valentine’s day, give yourself the gift of TIME:

·     time to enjoy the life you are living TODAY 

o  in the body that you have TODAY 

o  in the shape that you are in TODAY 

o  at the weight your body is TODAY 

This is my wish for you...It is SO worth it. To start today, click here to grab your YOU ARE ENOUGH Finally, Free, Fit and Fabulous 5 step guide to peace with food, eating, weight and body image. 

I wish I knew now, what I knew then.

Sometimes life takes you by surprise.  Suddenly you find yourself somewhere you don’t really want to be, or maybe somewhere you never EVER could have imagined.

Have you ever realized the decisions you made in the past have brought you right her, right now, to this place in your life?

After years of beating myself up, worrying about food, exercise, my body and the number on the scale, I realize it was all for good reason.  It has changed me, an actually has freed me from the chains of my own self-hatred.

Do you ever think to yourself: If I only knew then, what I know now

Have you ever thought about composing a letter to your younger self?  Can you think about how you would share some of the wisdom and experiences from your past? 

This letter can help you realize how much you have grown, how some of the hardest times you have gone through may have contributed in a positive way to your life right now.  Maybe you are stronger, more resilient or wiser.   Maybe you realize you are so much more than the size of your body or a number on the scale.

Kinda like this...

Dear Annie,

This life will get complicated.  It will be hard, frustrating, and confusing at times.  It will be filled with periods of pain and periods of joy.  There may be times when you will want to crawl under the covers and stay in bed, and other times you will find yourself jumping up and down on your bed with pure joy. 

There will be disappointment and failure, accompanied by feelings of sadness, anger, shame or guilt.  During these times, remember this:

·       These moments DO NOT DEFINE YOU

·       These feelings are real, validate them, and know they will pass

·       These are the times when you will learn and grow, gain strength, knowledge, compassion, understanding and resilience

·       These experiences may come again, and you will be better prepared

·       You may look back at these times and nod your head in understanding

·       THIS PERIOD WILL NOT LAST FOREVER

There will also be victories and successes that will be accompanied by feelings of happiness, confidence, warmth or exhilaration.  

During these times remember this:    Make time to CELEBRATE THESE MOMENTS.   

         All too often women move right onto the next big thing, without taking time to celebrate the success

·       Cherish them, write them down, capture them so that you can share the feelings and experiences with others (friends, family, grandchildren)

·       Think about the hard work and determination that gets overlooked in the accomplishment of a success.  Realize that it didn’t “just happen”.  That you made it happen through hard work, dedication and discipline.

·       Know that this will not last forever either, our lives naturally have an ebb and flow to them

The moments and experiences in your life become part of your story, it makes you who you are.  Your own unique, special, one of a kind YOU.

There are a few other tidbits I would like to share with you

·       You can agree to disagree with others
·       Communication is an important skill to continue to work on
·       Stay true to your own values and beliefs
·       Trust your gut
·       Bodies all come in different sizes and shapes
·       Size does not dictate health
·       Food is not the enemy
·       Everyone you meet has a story
·       Surround yourself with people you respect, like to be around and who give you energy
·       Dare to be different-what other people think of you is their business
·       Your career, family, successes, failures or body size do not define who you are
·       Your imperfections make you perfect
·       Develop an internal voice that is kind and compassionate
·       Treat yourself like your own best friend.

Live this life for today, don’t put off doing anything because of your size, weight or thoughts about what other people will think

With much appreciation and love,

Annie

Your turn, write your own letter.  What do you want to tell yourself?  Would you like guidance to find freedom in your body, freedom with food, freedom from you inner critic?  I have been there, I would love to support you in your journey, schedule an EMBRACE YOU breakthrough session today!