I look at the mirror at my thighs. The mini-me inside my head begins her assault; “I hate you, you are so big, why aren’t you thinner? And these pants look horrible!”
I stop, pause and take a breath. In this moment I ask this question; what have my thighs ever done to me to cause me to hate them so much?
They hear my question and respond:
Dear Annie,
That is a good question, why do you hate us so? All we have ever done for you is support you, yet you continue to treat us poorly, call us fat, pinch us and degrade us. We feel a punching bag, Brocken down and bruised. We don’t understand.
We have loved being strong and stable for you. As a matter of fact over the years we have:
- Played on sports teams
- Carried 4 babies to term
- Climbed numerous trees and mountains
- Jumped lots of waves at the beach
- Ran, skipped and jumped across fields and parking lots
- Helped carry your mom when she broke her hip
- Shopped, cooked and cleaned for your family
- Stood and cheered for your daughters at their games, concerts and plays.
We have loved helping you live your life.
We would appreciate it if you did not criticize us for what we look like. We always work hard for you and do our best. We want to be appreciated and accepted by you. Your respect is important to us. Can we please be friends?
We just wanted you to know,
Your stable and grounded thighs
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I am enlightened….
I have relied on this body to live my life. My thighs and my body that I’ve hated for so long, have done so much for me.
Does this sound familiar to you? Do you bash your body every chance you get? Join me in taking some steps to move from hating this body we were given to appreciating it.
It is time to begin to befriend our bodies, show it compassion and kindness… I’ve taken the first step by listening to my thighs.
7 Steps to Becoming Friends With Our Bodies
- Write one thing that your body has done for you to begin to build this friendship.
- Build this into a BODY ACCOMPLISHMENT LIST. List ALL of the things your body has done for you. This can include things like hugging a friend, sharing a smile or shivering to keep you warm.
- Next write a list of what your body CAN do for you today. Place your attentions on the can do's instead of the
- Pause, take a breath and become aware of your own judgments of yourself, when these thoughts come into your brain, begin to find some kindness with your words.
- Be mindful of social comparisons and judgments...these will leave you feeling "not good enough"
- After reflecting on all of the things your body does and can do for you, write a letter to your body or a specific body part that you dislike...AND then write a responds from your body (or body part)
- Don't spend any more time playing the WHEN I....(lose the weight)...THEN I (will go on that trip) GAME. Live your life today. Don't wait any longer
I write an apology...
Dear Thighs,
I cannot believe how horribly I have treated you all these years, after all you have done and continue to do for me. You have enabled me to experience some of my greatest memories… winning a soccer championship, climb trees, walking down the aisle at my wedding, and rocking my babies to sleep…
You have always grounded me, helped me up when I have fallen and stayed strong. I have hated you merely because you didn’t look a certain way. I am so very sorry. I now realize how much I have come to rely and depend on you to live my life, and I wanted to say thank you. Thank you for always being there for me, so strong, sturdy, dependable and sustainable.
I appreciate you, and am looking forward to the years to come.
With Gratitude,
Annie
