What is your purpose?

"Why do you do what you do?"  she asked...

I took a deep breath...my eyes started to leak...

"Because I don't want other women to waste the time, energy, and their self respect, self-esteem and self confidence that I did" I say.  Over 40 years of dieting, depression, anxiety, addiction, and continued criticism of self...

This video is to remind me of why I do what I do.

How to FEEL GOOD in Your Body

How often do you have a negative thought about your body?  

Is it first thing in the morning when you look in the mirror?  Stare at the clothes in your closet?  Step on the Scale?

It is no wonder that 97% of women have an “I hate my body” moment every single day…we have programmed ourselves!

We have, on average about 50,000 thoughts every single day, and research tells us that of these 50,000 thoughts, about 80% of them are negative!  AND on top of that as much as 90% of those are repeated day after day after day!  

So, with this knowledge, it is worth thinking about what it is you say to yourself about your body.  

Pause for a moment and think...What do you say to yourself when you first look in the mirror every morning?  

Is it easy to find a flaw with it right away?  Do you automatically bring judgment to the way you look first? 

Or, do you smile, say hello and take a moment to be grateful to have another day to experience this life and make more memories?

1 ONE of the quickest ways to begin to feel good in your body is to start every day being grateful for one thing about your body. It could be…

·      The unique color of your eyes

·      The strength of your legs

·      Your manicured fingernails

·      Your ability to hear the rain on the roof

·      The smoothness of your skin

·      The shape of your eyebrows

Anything counts here.  This can feel a little awkward at first, due to the fact that women are programmed not to look kindly towards themselves or their bodies in fear that others will think they are arrogant or narcissistic.

BUT, by starting the day noticing something that you like, or something you are grateful for about yourself, you set yourself up for noticing more beauty throughout the day ahead.  Just as if you started your day judging yourself, feeling shame, anger or frustration with your body, you set yourself up to be more judgmental of others as the day progresses.

Why not be a rebel! Begin your day by noticing the wonder of your body and all that it can do: hug, walk, watch a sunrise, listen to music, taste a piece of chocolate, sit in a Adirondack chair, stand to admire a piece of artwork, pick something up off the floor, swing on a swing or swim in the water.

By moving the focus away from what you cannot do and towards what you can do makes a big difference in the way you feel all day.  

2. Another way to feel good in your body is to wear clothes that fit and feel good on your body! 

So many women I know wake up every morning and stare into a closet of clothes that don’t fit, and from there they begin to go into an internal negative dialogue with themselves.  Feeling ashamed that they don’t look like they “should”, angry that they ate that second piece of pizza or didn’t get to the gym, frustrated that those pants from 5 years ago don’t fit anymore. 

I encourage you to clean out your closet and fill it with clothes that you feel good in, colors, fabrics and sizes that allow you to move and breathe. 

You have the ability to choose to start every morning looking at a closet of clothes that make you smile (setting you up to smile more during your day) VS looking at a closet day after day feeling bad about yourself, beating yourself up or even full of shame and hatred of yourself. 

·      You can box some clothes up, bring them to a consignment shop, put them out of site or give them to a shelter for someone else who may need them, to enjoy.

Wearing clothes that feel comfortable on your body is a great way to take care of yourself, an important self-care technique that can also help decrease stress and increase happiness.

3.  Lastly, another way to help you feel good in your body is to let go of all sources of comparison. 

Comparison of friends, family, social media feeds, cultural & societal norms and even younger versions of yourself.  

Here is how…

·      Unsubscribe to social media feeds that make you feel “less than” or not “good enough”

·      Find feeds that make you feel empowered and confident in how you look, check out Shaping Perspectives!

o   Shaping Perspectives...A Woman's Way to Joy

·      Notice when you begin to compare yourself to others...You are the only you.  Only you have your unique genetics.  Comparing yourself to another is like comparing apples to oranges

o   Start to appreciate your unique genetic type, tall, short, narrow hips, wide hips, voluptuous torso, thick thighs, small feet (you get the idea)

Research tells us that comparing yourself to others will decrease your own self-confidence, self-esteem, self-worth and overall body image. 

Feeling comfortable and appreciating the body that you have today can decrease stress, increase joy and will lead to a life full of more confidence and happiness

Changing Perspective, A Road to Joy

Have you ever had a good mood and a good day destroyed by stepping on a scale? Do you get frustrated, disgusted, disappointed and depressed by what it says?

Are you unhappy with your body? How does it feel when you catch a glimpse of yourself as you walk by a store window, see yourself in a mirror or spend an afternoon of clothes or bathing suit shopping?

Have you gained more weight than you would have liked to through stress, pregnancy, menopause, age, injury, or other life-changing event such as divorce, loss of spouse, disease, job loss, etc.

Do you spend your days beating yourself by listening to your inner mean voice (mini-me) scolding you over your weight, poor food choices, lack of motivation, failure to achieve your weight loss or fitness goals?

You are not alone…In fact

·      75% women are unhappy with the way they look,

·       Over 67% of women ages 15-64 withdraw from life-engaging activities,

·      95% of individuals will fail at achieving their weight loss goals.

I too suffered from hating my body and the way it looked, obsessed over the number on the scale, food choices, diets and compulsive exercise.  My story includes being diagnosed with Anorexia Nervosa and Exercise Bulimia.

My first diet was at age 10, I have spent the last 40 years gaining and losing 100’s of pounds. I have done it all including binging, cleanses and fasting. My time, energy and mind has been consumed with the number on the scale, fat grams, calories, what I should and shouldn’t eat, pinching my belly, criticizing my thighs and beating myself up with my inner mean girl “mini-me” because I didn’t look the way I thought I should.

After a lifetime of striving to achieve the perfect body and thin ideal, being frustrated with never being able to sustain any results, punishing my body with exercise until it was broken and needing surgery.  I was DONE.

I decided a few years ago to change my perspective and give up dieting and compulsive exercise  for good.  In addition I went back to school and earned a graduate certificate in Eating Disorders and became a certified Intuitive Eating coach.

Because of this I finally learned to accept, appreciate and respect the body that I was given, I fired the big bully (mini-me) in my head that has been beating me up over the last 40+ years, and began a peaceful, loving relationship with joyful movement, eating foods intentionally and my thighs.  It has changed my life.

In fact I created Shaping Perspectives: A Woman’s Way to Joy to support, guide, educate, encourage and empower other women to find peace, joy, and happiness. 

Women who implement the Shaping Perspectives approach to living, feel more grounded, experience higher energy and live more authentically. They develop a higher connection, awareness and acceptance of body, mind and spirit.

If you are looking to change your perspective and transform your life, I am extending to you

A Special Invitation to join me at in Hebron NH on June 8-11 for a FIND JOY! A Women’s Wellness Weekend Retreat.

Enroll Here

During this transformative weekend, YOU and other like-minded women will learn

a plethora of new tools and strategies to reduce stress and improve self care enabling you to move successfully through the next chapter(s) of your life.

·      You will experience an array of fun and functional movement and play activities

·      You will learn how to transform your “mini-me” (negative self-talk) to more empowering and “maxi-me” (positive self talk)

·      You will learn how to tap into your physiological signs of hunger, and fullness and how to Intentionally and Intuitively eat

·      You will experience a changing perspective on what your body can do for you enabling you to develop the appreciation, acceptance and respect your body deserves.

·      Learn how to support and connect to your authentic self and your best friend (YOU).

DON’T MISS OUT ON YOUR BEST LIFE by adopting the Shaping Perspectives approach to living joyfully. Feel more grounded, experience higher energy, live more authentically and develop a higher connection, awareness and acceptance of body, mind and spirit.

Please join me at the Coppertoppe Inn June 8-11 in Hebron NH.

Go here to enrolltoday